Week 1 - Time to start getting serious about a new lifestyle change

Call off the search party, I am back...Yes I admit that the last week of preseason I did not commit myself fully to eating healthy and exercising....I'm not really sure why, and I am not even going to try to justify why I did it...I think it was all those old demons in my head that were telling me that 12 weeks of eating healthy is a long time, and you deserve it...So for the four weeks of preseason, even though I was only half hearted in eating healthy, I still managed to lose 5kgs and drop quite a few cms from my body...I know that I could have done better, but I am still happy with that...So on Sunday, 12 February 2012, I did the dreaded photos in undies and a bra (There was no way I was going to try to squeeze myself into my bikinis, now that would have been a sight)....My husband took the photos, and this in itself was embarrassing enough....never before have I stood there in the daylight in my undies and bra infront of him looking like this....I think as you put on weight, you hide yourself away behind towels, doonas and clothes thinking that people will not realise that underneath all those layers you actually have weight to lose....but him being the loving supportive person he is, just took the photos....When I had a look at the photos, I thought front view is not very nice, could definitely lose weight...then went to the side view and though, oh thats not good but not that bad....then looked at the back view and thought, holy crap is that really what I look like....Instead of retreating into myself as I have in the past and eating to try to make myself feel better, I made a committment to myself to put myself into this program 150%....no more making excuses, no more trying to justify why it would be alright to eat that chocolate, or not to exercise....it was time to GET REAL and JFDI.....chocolate and all those other foods that I love to eat are always going to be around, but if I continued to eat crap all the time, I may not be....So for the last week I have contemplated whether I should post these photos, but then thought I will as I am NEVER going back here....from this time on, I WILL never allow myself to be that person in the photo....As Mish says, willpower is like a muscle, and each time you train your willpower, it becomes stronger and stronger....I know just like my muscles, my willpower is not that strong at the moment, but this week I have worked on training it, and so far it has had a very strenuous workout....



This week was full of many challenges for me.....Throughout the week I had many personal issues occuring with my 16 year old daughter (yes I hear those groans from here)......I know that I am an emotional eater, but I need to learn not to turn to food and to turn to other things that are good for me.....I managed to successfully turn to exercise for this emotional release....On Thursday two friends and I made the committment to come down to Melbourne for the final workout and after party, we thought we were so good and clever for booking our plane tickets so far in advanced and at quite a good price....On Friday, woke to another issue with my daughter...contemplated not to go to the gym for my final PT session (My lovely PT is having a total career change and will no longer be training me), but I decided to go (and I was actually quite happy that I did go)....Its amazing that exercise can put things into perspective.....But whilst at the gym, what do I see on the screens but the plane carrier who I had booked to go to Bali and Melbourne with had gone into voluntary receivership.....OMG about $2500 lost....that PT session certainly was a good thing on this day as it seemed to clear my head to make me think rationally about what I was going to do about my daughter and the plane tickets.....Personal problems are not fully sorted, but I am happy to say that I did not go into an emotional heap and attempt to eat my way out of it...I was able to smash out my very first SSS, burning 1119calories doing a Body Attack class and then the 60 second screamer from the Lean and Fit program (I think if I had to do four rounds, I would have been screaming as well....OMG it was certainly a workout)...I was so proud of my efforts as I could have given up after 1 round of it, but I continued on...This was the first time I have managed to burn the 1000 calories in one session.....

Another accomplishment I have been very proud of this week is this weekend I have not eaten outside of my program...I have managed to eat healthy and clean...I am glad that today is a rest day as I think I really needed it after yesterdays SSS......

I am loving Mish's videos that she is posting....One thing that hit home with me is not to compare myself to others....we are all in this for the same reason, to have a healthier lifestyle...we all have differing amounts to lose, and all have differing levels of fitness...Although I think it is only a human reaction to compare yourself to others....mine comparisions is not about weight loss, but about calorie burn...

One thing I do love about the facebook pages is the support you get....I have been inspired by many other 12 week people with their achievements whether they are little ones or major ones....

This week sees many challenges for me....I am going away with my husband this weekend to a beach community for a blues festival....Not really sure how I am going to be with my food.........In life there are many temptations and I know I have to learn to deal with each one, but so soon OMG I am a little worried......

THE LONG SLIPPERY SLIDE

Well certainly has been a long time between posts......and for those that are wondering, no it wasn't because I was way too busy to post, it is because I have been on a downward spiral.....I started the week off excellent with making those healthy food choices and exercising....Monday did an 6km run with a 2km walk and an RPM class burnt over 1000 calories doing it....Tuesday saw me do a Body Attack class and a Body Combat class, another 1000 calories done and dusted....Wednesday I had a PT session, and a body pump class, approximately 600 calories burnt, Thursday I particpated in an RPM class, burning 500 calories and then decided to eat.......and eat......and eat.......Woke up Friday determined to not let my unhealthy food choices affect me from the day before....Attended an early body combat class (546 calories burnt), 1/2 hour PT session (approximately 350 calories burnt....forgot to start my HRM, but this is usually what I burn in the 1/2 hour classes) and a body attack class (536 calories burnt)......I was also planning on attending my weekly boxing class in the afternoon, but alas, I started hearing those dreaded voices in my head again and ended up eating again (and this is said figuratively...I didn't actually hear any voices at all).....The slippery slide was a continuous one, with me still enjoying the ride Saturday morning......

I then decided to go onto the Newbies facebook group and read everyone else's success stories about exercising, and making good choices in food, despite having cravings and thought, OMG Tracey if others can do it, why are you allowing yourself to spiral out of control......So I am holding myself accountable....I am putting this out there for all to see....Today I am planning on organising my weekly menu and weekly exercise so that this is set in concrete....I am also going to continually remind myself about my committment to Michelle, my family and the rest of the people participating in this program.....I WILL NOT continue down this slippery slide....I WILL get off right now and carry on....My trip to Bali has been booked and paid for and I WILL NOT be allowing myself to be fat when I go over.....

I have decided that today is my rest day, tomorrow will be a day of exercise for me....bring on the program...only one more week till we all go on this wonderful, life changing journey.....

My committment

Michelle, MY COMMITTMENT TO YOU to ME, my husband, my daughter, my family and friends and my fellow 12 week members is to ultimately lose 25kgs by August 2012.....I WILL ACHIEVE THIS by committing to follow the 12 week program and eating no more than 1200 calories per day and exercising 6 days per week.....I committ to respecting my body forever and fueling it with healthier food choices, not binge eat to overcome my emotions, to not succumb to cravings and to eat clean and lean healthy foods.  I committ to learn strategies and techniques to overcome PAST unhealthy eating habits, and to live a healthier life....I committ to achieve all of the above 180%....I committ that when I fall, I will picked myself up, learn from my mistakes and carry on with a vengenance.....I will be supported in this by YOU, Michelle, my wonderful supportive husband Andrew, my daughter, Tahlia and my family, friends and fellow 12 week members.....I further committ to ensuring that I become a role model for my daughter by becoming a NEW and IMPROVED version of myself, who is healthy, happy, within her weight range and only fueling her body for energy.....This is my committment to all those people who matter to me....I KNOW I can do this, and I WILL achieve this committment by August 2012.....Bring it on, I am PUMPED and EXCITED and a touch NERVOUS of the next 12 weeks......

THE DREADED PHOTOS.....

So last post I was oh so confident with how I had been going......but as they say, with too much confidence comes the dreaded fall....and fall I did....On Thrusday, I had a shocking day with food choices...I was going along so well, however had a BBQ that I went to and chose all the bad choices in food...not that there was really any good food choices there....and it didnt end when I got home...

On Friday I woke with a venegance to get back into exercise and healthy eating....and exercise I did...I went ot a 5.45am Combat class and burnt 542 calories in the hour class...I then backed this class up with a 9.30am Body Attack class and burnt another 564 calories...then the final exercise for the day was at 4.30pm where I took a Fitbox hour class where I burnt 573 calories.....so I managed to burn 1679 calories all day...and even managed to eat healthy, get a facial and buy clothes (these had to be bought as it was task 4).....

Saturday I again woke all motivated and keen to continue to exercise and eat healthy...I participated in a double Body Attack (where I burnt 544 calories) and Body Pump class (266 calories burnt)...Saturday's total was 810 calories....Saturday I managed to eat healthy all day, despite going out for lunch with friends, and attending a 40th birthday party on the Saturday night.....

Sunday was spent planning the weeks meals, shopping and cleaning...I had organised to go for a run in the afternoon, however it was pouring with rain, I was still tired from the night before (and I can hear all the other excuses that I have used before)....these excuses won out this time, and the end result was me eating unhealthy for the rest of the night (OMG why do I do it all the time)....

I rained this unhealthy eating in by taking photos in my bra and undies...my husband and I had fun doing this (and for all you dirty minded people it was all clean fun)....I was after the 'model' shot (LOL).....I know I am going to have to do these photos again in another two weeks, but as someone on the facebook site said, it shows the changes in your body....I was also wanting to try and make the second time around just that little bit easier.....

 Side View.....

Front View

                                                                                                      Back View




Next time I post pictures, I will definitely see results.....Still oh so much to learn....On a positive I am going to be training for a 10km fun run on Good Friday......My husband and I are going to do it, before heading off to Rainbow Beach....

THE WEEK SO FAR......LESSONS LEARNT - Thursday 26 January 2012

Happy Australia Day everyone....I am all for a public holiday and a day off, but why did this day have to fall on the day when my favourite class is on at the gym....Oh well, I am going to have to go for a run instead....It is only another 5 weeks till my first fun run of the year....The 5km International Women's Day Fun Run/Walk......I am able to run for 3kms without stopping (and I could probably run the whole 5km if I went a bit slower)....my speed for this is 6 1/2 minute kilometres...As my fitness improves, I am finding it alot easier to this speed....

This morning I had planned on goign for a run at 5.30am....I had set my alarm to wake me and go...alarm went off, got turned off and I laid in bed thinking about what to have for breakfast....I sat there contemplating having one of my favourite breakfast meals of toast from white bread with butter and a scrapping of vegemite (YUM YUM YUM).....I think when I got out of bed in my head I had convinced myself that it would be alright to have one day of unhealthy eating as I had already eatend healthy for ten solid days....After getting out of bed, and before having a shower I decided to weight myself (AGAIN....it was only 24 hours since I had last weighed myself)...and found that I had lost another 700g from yesterday mornings weigh in....This was the kick in the guts that I needed .  I then KNEW I would not be eating unhealthy today, as I could see the results staring back at me on the scales.....DO you know what, in the past I would have used this as a justification to eat unhealthy.....not any more, I now know what is important to me and it is losing the weight not eating the unhealthy foods that end up making me feel sick and disgusted with myself....I REALLY think that perhaps I am starting to 'get my head right'.....

My personal trainer (who is a lovely beautiful person) would always say to me 'get your head right Tracey and the weight will fall off'....I knew this, but really wasn't in the right frame of mind to actually take the steps to do anything about how I thought about food....During my PT session on Wednesday morning, I had the usual questions from her, 'how has your food been'.....My usual response was normally 'alright during the week, but on the weekend I ate crap'...well this time I was able to say (and with some pride might I say) 'Really good'.....She then looked at me and said, 'I have noticed a change in you lately, You are in a different frame of mind and I think you might have your head right'.....Do you know what Katie....I also think that I might have my head right as well....I am finding that when I am thinking of eating junk food, the desire to eat it is not as strong, and I am able to distract myself easier from eating the crap food.....not only that, I am having the cravings for the crap food less and less and thinking about what exercise I will be doing, or how I can challenge myself more with my exercise more and more.....People would say that more you say no to the junk food, the more of a habit it will become....I am tending to believe them now....

I am so hapy with my success to date, I have managed to lose another 2.2kgs this week....From Wednesday 25 January 2012, I am now down to 94.8kg....I am so happy with the progress I have made to date....I have many more kilos to lose, but I KNOW I am going to do it....I have set a target of 70kgs to lose by the time I go to Bali (which will probably be 31 July 2012)...I know I can do this...My goals during this 12 week challenge was to lose 15 kgs (this works out to be 1.25kg per week).....I didn't even factor in the 4 weeks preseason....I am still going to strive to lose the 15kgs during the 12 weeks...If I manage to do that, I will only be about 5 to 10kgs off my goal weight....and I will be in my healthy weight range....

So how have I been able to managed these remarkable results this week......well I would love to say easily....but that would be a lie...I achieved the 2.2kg weight lose, by sticking to no more than 1200calories (and this was choosing healthy foods) and exercising a SHIT LOAD.....

So since Monday 23 January 2012, I have completed the following exercise:

Monday 23 Janaury 2012 -
6.5km run/walk - 4km running, 2.5km walking burning a total of 379 calories.
RPM class burning a total of 479 calories
Pump class burning a total of 218 calories

Overall burnt 1076 calories.

Tuesday 24 January 2012 -
Attack class burning a total of 516 calories
Combat class burning a total of 625 calories

Overall burnt 1141 calories.

Wednesday 25 January 2012 -
30 minute PT burning a total of 366 calories
Boxing class burning a total of 485 calories
Pump class burning a total of 235 calories

Overall burnt 1086 calories.

So in three days, I have burnt 3303 calories, which is nearly equal to half a kilogram....Gone FOREVER....

I am hoping that my head stays in the right place for the next 14 weeks and beyond....

PERHAPS I AM STARTING TO LEARN A FEW THINGS....

This week saw me commence the week with determination to eat healthy and exercise....I was still thinking about the Saturday nights effort of succumbing to the temptations of takeaway food and unhealthy snacks that were in the cupboard and was determined to not let this happen this week....So this is the week that was....

Monday - RPM (am), Pump (pm) - 650 calories in total

Tuesday - Attack (am), Combat (pm) -1034 calories in total

Wednesday - RPM (very early am), Pump (am) - 772 calories in total

Thursday - Treadmill and exercise bike at gym (am), Attack (pm) - 936 calories in total

Friday - 30 minute PT (am), Boxing (pm) - 792 calories in total

Saturday - Double class of Attack and Pump (am) - 807 calories in total

Sunday - 6km jog on beach - 383 calories in total

Making a grand total of 5374 calories for the week....Now I am really proud of this effort and am amazed that I have had time to fit anything else in the week. I have not been tired, which is good, so obviously this much exercise doesn't really hurt me that much....I cannot see that with full time work I am going to be able to sustain this amount of exercise each week, however I will give it a try...

I am starting to see some flow on affects of eating healthy and exercising as well. I think given I have limited time, I am more planned and organised. On weekends I have been planning the weekly dinners (with me even planning everything I will eat in a day)...I have found this excellent to hold myself accountable, as if I don't eat whats on my daily menu, this means I am not sticking to my calorie amounts for the day....Since the beginning of the year, I have been really good at sticking to the 1200 calories per day, with only the occasional slip up. I have found that my slip up's have only been for one or two days at a time, then I will get back into healthy eating and exercising. In the past, if I had a slip up, it would take me weeks and sometimes even months to get myself back on track....Perhaps with old age I am learning a thing or two.....

This week I have completed two of the eight preseason tasks..This was task 1 of introducing yourself and task 2 - Excuses and Solutions....I found that I have many excuses to why I don't exercise and eat healthy....Some of these excuses I have even managed to not use this week.....

Something I am really proud of this week is the fact that I have stuck 100% to healthy eating and exercise...This has been the first week of no slip ups for a very VERY long time.....I am not saying I have not thought about eating crap food because on three occasions I have....being Thursday, Friday and Saturday (and who knows, today is not over yet so perhaps I will think about having something later on this afternoon)....but I have held strong to the belief that I deserve better than I am giving myself at the moment....I have set myself a goal of losing the 30kgs by end of July (which is only 6 months away...or 28 weeks away)...Actually it is no longer 30kgs.....thats what it was at the beginning of the year....From last Wednesday's weight in it was about 27kgs.....so this is achievable and doable if I just commit to this new lifestyle of mine.....

So I think a couple of posts ago I promised to put my statistics down as this is something I have never been able to admit to people in the past (that is until I lose the weight and then I am able to say, oh by the way I was 130kg)......So here goes....

At the beginning of the year 3 January 2012:

Weight - 102.9                                                        Left Calf - 42 1/2

BMI - 34.8                                                              Left Thigh - 79 1/2

Chest - 108 1/2                                                       Left Arm - 38

Waist - 109                                                            Right Calf - 42 1/2

Hip - 127                                                               Right Thigh - 79

Thigh - 130                                                           Right Arm - 37 1/2

So with these figures in mind, my stats from my last weigh in on Wednesday 18 January 2012 were:

Weight - 97.0    loss of 5.9kg                              Left Calf - 40 1/2    loss of 2cm

BMI -   32.8      loss of 2                                      Left Thigh - 76 1/2  loss of 3cm

Chest - 103 1/2     loss of 5cm                              Left Arm - 35 1/2   loss of 2 1/2cm

Waist - 103      loss of 6cm                                   Right Calf - 41 1/2  loss of 1cm

Hip - 123         loss of 4cm                                   Right Thigh - 75 1/2  loss of 3 1/2cm

Thigh - 122     loss of 8cm                                    Right Arm - 35 1/2  loss of 2cm

So overall I have managed to lose 5.9kg in about three weeks and lost 37cm across my whole body....I am so freaking happy......Now I only really have 25kgs to lose to be at MY ideal weight.......and only another 8 measures on the BMI scale to be at ideal weight.....yeh....I am sooo going to kill this challenge and I will be FIT, FABULOUS AND HEALTHY for Bali in August.....

So, so loving this challenge still....

WEDNESDAY WEIGH IN - Wednesday 18 January 2012

So, today was WEIGH IN day.....argh the dreaded weigh in day where we all step onto those scales with anticipation, dread and just a little excitment......when we lose big numbers we excitedly get off and tell the first person that we can how much we lost.....when we don't lose big numbers we sit there with a sinking feeling in our stomachs and the negative self talk starts, 'god I worked so hard'....'what's the point in eating healthy and excercising if I ONLY lose .5kg'.......do you know what I fall into this trap as well....I know it is not right to think like this, and all the well meaning people say, 'that's great, remember a loss is a loss.....you will lose more next week' and so on...........I know people are trying to be kind and supportive, but it is really not what you want to hear at the time....so today I hopped onto the scales and found that I had lost .6kg....now initially I did have a bit of a feeling of disappointment (but it did only last for about a second) before I took ownership of my previous week and realised I was LUCKY to have had such a GREAT weight loss, when for two days I overindulged on all the foods that had made me fat in the first place (oops am I suppose to say that I am FAT...has this been outlawed yet)...so I need to realise that I had a lucky escape and make sure that I LEARN from this experience....I DO NOT want to be standing on the scales next Wednesday and continue to have that sinking feeling......Already I have found that I am holding myself more ACCOUNTABLE for my food choices....It is no-one else's fault if I reach for that chocolate bar, or have a piece of cake at the work function...this is my LIFE and my CHOICES........